Flow State and Mental Block
By Jessy Nolan - 10 May 2024
When I spend time around kind people or while I'm on my own, I can enter a flow state and sustain it for as long as I want, which feels amazing and increases my productivity and creativity drastically. But if I'm around stressful people who have anger issues, toxic traits that they're in denial about, are always saying negative stuff, etc., it completely blocks up my mind making life a lot more difficult.
Since I started taking my physical and mental health seriously in early 2023, my life has improved quite a lot. I'm no longer numb and depressed. I can feel emotions really intensely again like when I was a kid, instead of dissociating to avoid feeling negative. If I want to stay feeling this alive, I have no choice but to limit contact or go no contact with angry, toxic, and negative people. When you're not numb as fuck and have the capacity to feel empathy for others instead of just yourself, other people's moods are incredibly infectious, like a virus.
If you want to sustain having a healthy personality, you really have no choice but to avoid toxic people as much as possible. The more time I spend around genuinely kind people while being willing to reflect on the toxic aspects of my personality, the more I'm able to change and grow for the better.
People seem to think being kind means you have to be a doormat who lets people treat you poorly. That's simply not the case. You can be kind while also being confidently assertive, not tolerating any fucked up behavior regardless of how much they try to downplay it and manipulate you into thinking it's normal.
You have to build strong consistent boundaries in this world or broken people will see you as an easy target to use as a verbal or physical punching bag to tear your self esteem down to raise theirs up. No mentally healthy person treats others like this. If they don't want to change, you simply have to accept you've outgrown them and distance yourself from them. People can only meet you at the level they meet themselves.
I truly love life again. A life that is simply too short to tolerate messed up treatment from anyone. To go back to old standards would be to betray myself.
Since I started taking my physical and mental health seriously in early 2023, my life has improved quite a lot. I'm no longer numb and depressed. I can feel emotions really intensely again like when I was a kid, instead of dissociating to avoid feeling negative. If I want to stay feeling this alive, I have no choice but to limit contact or go no contact with angry, toxic, and negative people. When you're not numb as fuck and have the capacity to feel empathy for others instead of just yourself, other people's moods are incredibly infectious, like a virus.
If you want to sustain having a healthy personality, you really have no choice but to avoid toxic people as much as possible. The more time I spend around genuinely kind people while being willing to reflect on the toxic aspects of my personality, the more I'm able to change and grow for the better.
People seem to think being kind means you have to be a doormat who lets people treat you poorly. That's simply not the case. You can be kind while also being confidently assertive, not tolerating any fucked up behavior regardless of how much they try to downplay it and manipulate you into thinking it's normal.
You have to build strong consistent boundaries in this world or broken people will see you as an easy target to use as a verbal or physical punching bag to tear your self esteem down to raise theirs up. No mentally healthy person treats others like this. If they don't want to change, you simply have to accept you've outgrown them and distance yourself from them. People can only meet you at the level they meet themselves.
I truly love life again. A life that is simply too short to tolerate messed up treatment from anyone. To go back to old standards would be to betray myself.